April 22, 2012 § 1 Comment
I realize I’ve been neglecting this blog alot this semester, mainly because I’m so caught up with school work and work. I’ll work harder on not letting this blog stagnate.
Recently, I’ve had the opportunity to work on designing a company logo, a flyer as well as a foldable water bottle. And in terms of school work, we’ve been working on creating Team Fortress 2 download packs, character concepts for a mod game using the design style of Metal Gear Solid series, and designing robots & machines, learning about painting, folds, textures etc.
I’ve been so caught up in drawing and turning in assignments that I’ve lost sight of the reason why I’m here at TAD in the first place – which is to be a student. To learn and make mistakes. I take so long to complete an assignment because I find myself obsessing over the tiniest details and I get frustrated when I feel it is not going the direction I want. Because I take so long to complete one assignment, I stay up longer and work harder into the wee hours to get through all the assignments. I get frustrated because each assignment takes equal or even more time than the last because I’m caught up with being a perfectionist and because I’m increasingly worn out & tired. This leads to me becoming severely unmotivated, uninspired, and worse of all, I constantly work to fight my mind which is screaming at me saying that it wants to be distracted and that it wants to do something fun. And this negative cycle compounds over time. Art was THE fun thing to do, but when it starts becoming a drag, that’s a serious problem isn’t it?It is not like I don’t know what I am doing to myself, but it takes strength to get a hold of myself and face the problem I’m creating for myself.
Creating pretty pictures are nice, but if they don’t solve the design problem or relay the idea, then what is the point in the long run. They would just be pretty pictures and nothing more. From the very beginning, Ron said something to the effect of, Don’t give me a pretty picture! I know you can draw. We are not here to make pretty pictures, we’re here to solve problems. I thought I got what he was trying to say to us, but naturally, it is obvious I didn’t.
The idea of creating a pretty picture is good. But really, it’s not a good idea to be obsessed about it. This is not a new revelation. It’s just hard to abide by it.
So, this is what I’m working on now. To work on stuff which I will throw away and not keep. Meaning, to put down my ideas fast. Any idea that I think will potentially solve the problem. I shouldn’t care or obsess about whether they are good or bad or pretty. The whole point is to put them all down so that I can throw out those that don’t work ! The time spent working hard to save my pretty picture is now turned into more productive because I know from the get go, what works and what doesn’t, and because I didn’t spend time on cranking out the pretty stuff, if I were to throw it away, I really haven’t lost a lot of time and effort, and it will really spare me the frustration and heartache.
Once the frustration and heartache is dealt with, maybe I’ll be able to sleep better because I’ve solved many problems in one day and feel less stressed out. And once I’m able to sleep better, I’m pretty sure I will be able to work better and faster, which gives me more time in the day and the positive cycle starts. I’m hopeful about this and really trying to embrace this concept this last week. But that doesn’t mean that I won’t have to put in effort in the long run to make this work.